|Three of Cups|
Book: Celebration, jubilation, merriment, sincere allies who wish the seeker well, playful affection.
Guidance: Draw on the energy of the earth. Take time to enjoy friendships.
Ironic card to pull when I am feeling friendless and mired in loneliness. It just hurts to think about people having friends when I'm mired in this stupid half life where it feels my life has no joy and no meaning. I don't even know how to get where I want to be. I do know that I have to set better boundaries to get out of Chicago.
December 23, 2017
It's over a year later and I still don't have friends, but I'm realizing I crave my alone time and I'm not really ready to give that up to have friends. I tried by joining the church, but that just all seems so fake and like the people are not very nice. I was so hurt when I wasn't able to make the first session and I said that I couldn't go because my daughter had a minor car accident and no one took the time to send me a message and say I'm sorry. I thought that was so cold and incredibly bitchy. And now they're calling and saying, "we don't think you're interested, etc., etc." Of course they're right because why would I want to hang out with people who have no compassion?