Saturday, August 26, 2017

Three of Fire

Three of Fire
Dark Goddess Tarot
First Impressions:  This card always seems to me as if the three little creatures are waiting for her to come down from the rock.  Circe seems to be stirring up some magic in her pot.  Overall, this card gives off a vibe of waiting.

Book:  Ideas have a life of their own, Knowing lore of all places, Friend of the witches, creative ability is high.

Guidance:  Make the most of your creativity, express it, embrace change, mix up things in your life, change up your house

Journaling

Interesting that I pulled this card as I am embracing change and changing my personal space.  I'm also cleaning out and getting rid of things that no longer serve me.  This is a time of transformation and I feel the energy of change flowing. 

Despite all the nastiness in the government, I feel good changes are afoot and it is time to embrace my creative side.

December 18, 2017

I love the thought that ideas have a life of their own and that we can manifest ourselves.

December 27, 2017

One of the things I've realized with this round of cleansing and getting rid of is that I don't have to purge everything at once.  I can take my time and genuinely evaluate what serves me before I just get rid of it all.  I've decided I'm going to take the next year to work through the books on my bookshelf in the wood room and I'm going to either keep them permanently, keep them as I haven't read them yet, or get rid of them.  I don't have to make a decision today.  In the past, I always thought that if I made a decision, I had to implement it right away, but I've realized that's not true.  I can take time to evaluate and gently get rid of things instead of rushing to get rid of them.  Doing things this way brings me peace instead of frustration


Friday, August 25, 2017

Siren of Water

Siren of Water
Dark Goddess
First Impressions:  This card is beautiful and reminds me of a Botticelli painting.  Aphrodite is gorgeous and the epitome of sex appeal, but she is always painted alone.  She is the Goddess of Love, but she is never a goddess that I would call upon for love as she strikes me as not about love as much as about worship. 

Book:  Engenders desire for love, connections and communion, Passion overcoming the haughty, opening the heart.

Guidance:  Love is a risk you must take, create or do something you love, admit your desire

Journaling:

This card is yet another reminder to open my heart to love.  One of the things I've been pondering lately is who I want to be with.  Is it someone I already know who knows and loves the "old" me?  Or is it someone new who will just be getting to know me?  There is a part of me that feels I have to move on and that I'm ready for the next phase of my life. 

Someone I care about did something that I feel disrespected me and I'm not sure how to react.    I know that I need respect in my life and if people can't respect me, then they don't need/deserve to be in my life.  For me this card is about loving and respecting myself.

December 18, 2017

It was pretty cool when I was putting up the tree and found my Bremen ornament and instead of immediately thinking about who I was with in Germany, I thought about my own memories of being in Bremen around the holidays.  This was huge progress for me.  I know there will always be a part of me that loves him, but I'm done waiting and I'm ready to move on with my life.

December 26, 2017

I've gotten a lot better about putting myself first and loving myself.  Maybe the message of Aphrodite is that all things are about love and pleasure and that loving ourselves can help create an atmosphere where there is more love and light in the world overall.

Thursday, August 24, 2017

Witch of Water

Witch of Water
Dark Goddess Tarot
First Impressions:  Emotional Control

Book:  Power of the goddess is eating all sins, salt holds purification, and protection

Guidance:  Demonstrate your beliefs and ethics, look beyond form to essence, bathe in salt water

Journaling:

Interesting meaning of this card.  I like looking at it as purification and the need to cleanse ourselves.  I need to do some meditations on this card and also take a salt bath.

December 19, 2017

I'm realizing that purification is about more than clearing the energy around me.  It is also about clearing out the old behaviors and thought patterns that are keeping me stuck.  I need to let go of my poverty consciousness and choose to believe that it will all work out.

December 26, 2017

It is so awesome to read through old journals as I can see my growth.  I can see ideas that bubble up that are being implemented at deeper and deeper levels.  Redirecting my thoughts is something that still feels uncomfortable for me as it feels unnatural, but as I read through my old journals I can see that I am continuing to get better at it.

I know I'm making progress because when I got an invite to a reorganization meeting from Darshan, my immediate reaction was to freak out and assume I was being fired.  However, I talked myself off the ledge by reminding myself that they would not fire me on an open meeting.  If I was going to get fired, I would have already been told.  That was cold comfort, but it did bring me peace and I was able to actually sleep without totally freaking myself out with worry.  I also reminded myself that there was nothing I could do about it anyway.  If it happened, it happened and I'd deal with it.

Wednesday, August 23, 2017

Six of Air

First Impressions:  Movement

Six of Air
Dark Goddess Tarot
Book:  Goddess of arts, healing, and battle, being initiated to battle, this is a time of learning

Guidance:  Accept guidance and find your purpose, prepare for challenges, learn from trusted teachers, balance activities

Journaling:

Wow!  What an interesting card to draw today for what I learned from today.  I've been asking what the next steps are and where I go from here.  I'm being led and this card is telling me to accept guidance and find my purpose.  Every time I ask to be led, it keeps coming back to tarot.  I love tarot and it has really helped me to make that final push to heal and all of the work I've done to date has been amazing, but it is the tarot work that has been pushing me thee last few yards.

What I love about it is that it is the same that is different.  I read the cards with my mind and my heart.  I will continue to pray and meditate and allow myself to be guided wherever this journey takes me.

December 18, 2017

I'm still not sure what it all means, but I know I cannot earn what I earn now by doing tarot and I need to earn my salary.

December 25, 2017

The message I'm being given is to trust and I will be taken care of.  I need to trust that it will all turn out the way it is meant to.  It is incredibly hard to live a life of trust and surrender as those two words are the antithesis of my personality, but I really need to let go of my need to control my destiny and trust that they have something amazing and wonderful in store for me and that all I need to do is to take the next step.  I know I've been guided to where I'm at today and that the next step has appeared as I've needed to take it, so why should I doubt that they will continue to guide me and be there for me?

Friday, August 18, 2017

How can I be more mindful?


Shaker Lake Nature Preserve, Shaker Heights, OH

As I was walking through the Shaker Lake Nature preserve I was struck by how easy it is to be mindful in the woods when there are fewer man-made distractions.  So I stopped and settled myself on a wooden bench and pulled a few cards.

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