What negative aspects of my shadow do I project?
As much as I love the Dancer Two card in its aspect of soulmate, the message it gives me about this question is that I often turn my back to people I love. If things get too emotionally intense, I will back away and be standoffish rather than be emotionally available and open to another person. I also tend to pull away when conversations get too personal. I don't like to let people in because of my fear of being hurt so I walk away and show my back.
The flip side of this is Dreamer Ten which tells me that if I get comfortable with someone I can bleed my emotional pain all over someone else. Up until recently, I've taken emotional hostages and expected them to be my emotional support human and take whatever pain and ick I've dredged up. If they pulled back or had their own issues, I got angry because they weren't there for me in the the way I needed them to be there for me.
Dreamer Queen sitting on her pile of books tells me that when I am in uncomfortable situations, I approach them from a place of the mind and not the heart. This reminds me of my original list of qualifications for a partner. Because my ex was basically a deadbeat, my first criteria for being with someone was that they made as much or more than I do. A lot of people pointed out to me that I was ruling out a lot of potential partners on something arbitrary. They made the argument that a lot of guys were not like my ex and were self supporting and would not have their ego's bruised by someone making more money than they did. To a certain extent, I see their point, but my fear has kept me from removing that criteria.
As always with the Tarot of the Sidhe, I'm getting a lot of good reads that are truly speaking truths I need to hear.
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