Wednesday, March 28, 2018

Daily Draw: Chariot

First Impressions:  Pulled two directions, controlling one's emotions

Book:  Directed and controlled energy, clear road to hopes and dreams

Guidance:  Use your mind and your heart to be successful, give it your best shot, do what you can

Journaling:

There is so much to think about with the Chariot.  My gut instinct react to this card is always about controlling my emotions and keeping them in check.  This is so true for me because I have been vulnerable lately and I've let the negative voices in my head get the best of me.  Everything I don't do perfectly, I've magnified.  When I think about our presentation, I did a good job.  I was articulate, I made my points, and I did a good job.  It is not my fault that our presentation was a mishmash and it is not my fault that other people convoluted testing and training.  None of that is my fault.  I can only control me.  Everything else is outside of my purview.  I provide my input and if people choose not to listen, there is nothing that I can do about it.  I cannot control the universe.

I think I need to have that tattooed on my forehead because I continually forget.  I also need to quit taking everything so personally.  It's not personal.  I know that part of the reason that I do this is that all I have in life is work.  I need to expand my horizons and make work a part of my life instead of my whole life.  I need to pray for guidance and figure out how to go from here to there.

December 25, 2018

There's lots of juicy stuff in this card.  One of the things I'm taking away as I re-read what I wrote and as I meditate on the chariot is about the importance of staying in my lane and I do that by not getting distracted by the things that are outside of the lines that I cannot control.  I cannot control the shit my mother says, but I can control whether or not I listen to it.  I cannot control how other people do their presentations, but I can control whether I take ownership or not.

As I'm meditating on this card, I'm realizing that it is a card of self control.  It is a card that is saying I can drive forward or I can choose to be distracted.


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