Monday, March 26, 2018
Daily Draw: Four of Pentacles
Book: Grasping and being insecure does not buy security, what would it take to find something that fulfilled you?
Guidance: Look carefully at what you are clinging to and are you clinging in an unhealthy way?
I know that most people view this card as negative, but I view it as a reminder to conserve my energy and protect what's mine. This can and does raise the question as to whether I'm clinging to something that doesn't work for me? Am I holding on to things that I should let go of? There is also a case of fear and potentially hanging on to something that is not right for me. These are questions I need to reflect on. I know I'm ready to let go of John and Charlene. And as an aside I'm very proud of myself for calling her Charlene and not honoring her by calling her mom. That is huge for me.
December 25, 2018
For me, this has always been a card about protecting what is mine and it has always been more about emotional protection than about protecting wealth. However, as I enter this year of vulnerability, I'm realizing that I need to open up and risk my heart getting broken. That being said, I don't think that protecting my heart up until now was bad. I think I needed to protect my heart because I was not strong enough and fierce enough to allow myself to be vulnerable.
I've learned that before I can be strong enough to be vulnerable and open myself up to love, I have to know that I am fierce and strong and courageous. By knowing those things, I know that I am strong enough to protect myself if something goes wrong. That is an amazing realization.
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