Monday, May 20, 2019

Deliberate Draw: Six of Cups

First Impressions:  Nostalgia, partnership

Book:  Sanctuary, loving sanctuary of family and friends and family, kindness and compassion, relaxing fully into who we truly are

Guidance:  Leave the worries of the world behind, live fully in the present, draw insight from the past to enrich the present

Journaling:

The six of cups is a card I have historically disliked because my childhood memories were not all happy and I equated this card with an imbalance of power that occurs in childhood.  As a child, we have little power and we are at risk of being exploited or taken advantage of by those older than ourselves.  Even though the meanings from most decks are all about nostalgia, I never warmed to this card, but the cards from the World Spirit deck and the Druidcraft deck are different representations of the six of cups.  The six of cups from the World Spirit deck allows me to see two friends who are hanging out and having fun and there isn't the power differential that there is in the traditional RWS version of this card.

The six of cups from the Druidcraft deck shows an older boy and younger girl being supervised by a parent, which gives me a feeling of safety that the traditional RWS card doesn't give me.  Additionally, the reflection for the DruidCraft deck by Philip Carr-Gomm provided exactly the insight I needed as I contemplate letting go of the anger and pain my relationship with my mother causes.  Carr-Gomm said, "Receiving this card in a reading may mean that you are working on integrating the gifts and experiences of your past--your childhood, or even past lives--with your consciousness in the present."  This reading captured where I am at as it was an acknowledgement that I cannot totally sever my past and I need to figure out how to start from where I am.  It also means that I need to take a step back and look at the past as a whole and not focus on all the negativity and anger.  I need to remember the 26 mile bike ride we took with my mom and how much fun that was, I need to remember baking cookies, and the fact that she drove me to college.  What I've finally realized is that by acknowledging the good doesn't negate the bad, it just means that I am choosing to love myself and make room in my life for good memories instead of just hoarding the bad memories. 

As a demonstration of the synchronicity of the world, I'm reading Beyond Forgiveness:  Reflections on Atonement by Phil Cousineau and the passage I read tonight, an essay by Michael Bernard Beckwith, included a reflection on the biblical story of Jesus telling people to turn the other cheek.  Beckwith said, "Many people interpret this as saying that if someone hits you, you should turn the other cheek and let them hit you again.  I don't think he meant that.  I think he meant that you are supposed to give back a different form of energy.  If you are given hate or indifference, you are to give back love, patience, and compassion."  Tears streamed down my cheeks as I read this because I realized it was exactly what I needed to hear.  I've started doing a metta, or loving kindness meditation every night.  First I remind myself that I love myself and I am loved, then I expand the circle outward to include my children, my friends, and eventually the world.  As I expand the circle of meditation, I envision each person/group receiving peace and love.  Part of the meditation is specifically giving loving kindness to people who are difficult.  I realized as I read Beckwith's words that I had not been including my mother in my loving kindness meditation.  I took a pause, breathed deeply, then recited my version of the loving kindness meditation for my mother:

Mom, you love yourself
You are surrounded by love
You are kind and compassionate to yourself
You are surrounded by kindness and compassion
You are strong
You are fierce
You are vulnerable
You love with an open heart
You are enough
You have enough

As I visualized her and said these words, I felt peace within my heart.


Exercise

Begin your own metta meditation practice to begin blessing those who you find difficult.

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