Friday, July 19, 2019

Deliberate Draw: Eight of Pentacles

First Impressions:  Diligence, being supported

Book:  Ready to take a talent to the next level of mastery, experienced teacher can provide guidance

Guidance:  Long hours of practice will be ready

Journaling:

I chose this card today because today was a day when I really felt like I was advancing in my job and ready to take it to the next level.  Because of my efforts we have multiple projects with full OCM in the pipeline and people are honestly looking at what we do having an educational component instead of just getting through the workshops.  That was refreshing to hear and I felt as if I was vindicated in all the hard work that I do.  However, even though I may be at the forefront of the efforts, it is and always has been a team effort as I couldn't do this without the support of my management team and without mentorship.  It is so incredibly helpful to have someone to go to when things get rough and to have someone who can give me guidance about the company and how to navigate.

The personal work I've done has also paid off as I'm starting to see how I self sabotage and refuse to view myself as a leader because of my dad's belief that women should not take high paying jobs because men need them more.  That was a bullshit comment that my dad made and it was wrong.  What he seemed not to understand is that a) jobs should be given to the people who are the most qualified and should not be given out based on need and that b) there are plenty of women who are responsible for supporting their families.  I loved my father dearly, but that was one of the most asinine things I've ever heard anyone say and the really unfortunate part is that I had no idea until recently how much I had taken that stupid comment to heart and was believing that as a woman I had no right to be in a position of power.  Although intellectually, I saw the stupidity and misogyny in this comment, there was obviously a little piece of my soul that bought into this viewpoint and I've been self sabotaging every time I have people reporting to me.  However, it's time for that to stop and I'm ready to move into a more senior role.

Gratitudes

I'm grateful I got home safely
I'm grateful for John's guidance and mentoring
I'm grateful for our good meeting about kick offs
I'm grateful for the support of my team
I'm grateful that Wendy loves me so much
I'm grateful for the time spent cuddling Wendy
I'm grateful for the yummy lunch with Sean and Cam
I'm grateful for fresh raspberries
I'm grateful for my beautiful house


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