Friday, October 18, 2019

Deliberate Draw: Seven of Swords

First Impressions:  Sword play, graph in the sky

Book:  Focused concentration, balancing

Guidance:  Clear space for difficult tasks

Journaling

I like the reminder of the need to clear space for difficult tasks.  I'm not very good at that and I let myself get all swirly over the weirdness going on in my life.  I take things way too personally and forget that things will change over time.  K. at B. is driving me nuts right now as she is just a small minded little person who sees conspiracy theories everywhere and she is so desperate to be promoted that she has to grab all the attention.  I'm not that person.  I know I do a good job and I don't need the glory for this and I've been asking myself a lot lately if I am upset because I'm not getting the glory or if I'm upset because dealing with her is a waste of time and we're treading water because she is clueless and I think the bottom line is that I'm annoyed because we are treading water because she is clueless.  I've done this so many times that I don't need the kudos that come from this and I can do this in my sleep because I've done it so many times before.  I'm struggling because I don't have time to waste right now and she's a drain on my energy.

I need to figure out what my next steps are and how to withdraw from this client without losing the gig for itelli.  I don't know what the solution to that is, but I think I need to clear my head space and let go of all the drama. I  just need to focus on the work and not worry about the drama.  The drama will work itself out.  I just need to let go of the need to control the situation.  I cannot control her and sometimes all you need to do is to just let it play out.  She will eventually get tired of the situation, then I can do things that I know are the right thing to do.

Interesting when I read the blog post at Lisa's site about this card, it talks about being deceived because you were gullible and to really pay attention and know the truth.  That tells me that she is being dishonest. 

Gratitudes
I'm grateful for the hard work on my school work
I'm grateful for the yummy taco salad
I'm grateful for the great walk with the doggods
I'm grateful for the beautiful weather
I'm grateful for waking up with Wendy snuggling

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