Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Deliberate Draw: Eight of Swords

First Impressions:  Eight of Swords

Book:  Raven can easily hop out of circle of swords. The Eight of Swords is a card of empowerment, of moving beyond our limitations into the vastness of eternity.

Guidance:  Most of what traps us is an illusion

Journaling

There are some days that I agree 100% that we have the ability to change our lives and to hop out of the circle of swords, but there are other days when I feel totally overwhelmed by life and feel as if nothing I do matters and that there is no way I can change my life.  I do feel trapped by work and as if nothing that I do matters or means anything.  I know I get paid a whole lot of money to help companies convince people to change their software and most days that feels pretty crappy.  I feel like I'm just helping the man.  I never wanted to go into the corporate world and I never wanted to be locked into working for a paycheck, but here I am.  The worst part is that I don't know how to get out of the gilded cage that I've built for myself.

My heart is in the world of tarot and spirit, but that doesn't pay the bills and I don't know how to find something that speaks to my heart and pays the bills.  The guidance from reading Lisa's blog post on the eight of swords is that I can move beyond my limitations.  I don't know exactly what that means or what I need to do to change my mind or my way of thinking.  I just feel trapped and as if nothing that I do matters because I am going to be on this hamster wheel forever and I'm going to continue to have to spend time doing things that don't matter to me to pay the bills.

Gratitudes
I'm grateful for the safe drive home
I'm grateful for the good meeting with K
I'm grateful for the yummy Casey's Pizza
I'm grateful for snuggling with Wendy
I'm grateful for getting stuff done

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