Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Daily Draw: Nine of Swords and Loss


This was an interesting card combination as I pulled it as I was thinking about how sad I was to be leaving my job and moving on and about how afraid I was that I wouldn't do well at my new company.  I literally had those thoughts, then pulled the cards.  What I loved about these cards is they matched what I was feeling, but gave me a very hopeful and thoughtful message.  The Nine of Swords from The LightSeer's tarot  is all about nightmares and perceiving things are a disaster when they really aren't.  This card is a reminder to set worry off to one side and focus on the positive.  One of the things that I remind myself of when I'm feeling like no one will like me or I don't know what to do, etc.  is to remind myself that my new boss and my new team has an incentive to want me to succeed.  They want me to do well so that they do well.  They would not have hired me if they thought I was going to fail because that is way too much work for them.  Everyone wants me to succeed and they are going to be rooting me the whole time.  I have to remind myself of that when I start to beat myself up and think poorly of myself.  I also have to remind myself that it will take a while to settle in at Nestle and that that's okay.

Once I've looked at things and faced reality, the Loss card from the Journey Oracle reminds me that it really is okay to let myself grieve and let myself be sad and grieve if there is really a loss to be grieving.  All the work I've done on grief and loss this year reminds me that it really is okay to let myself feel what I need to feel.  I don't have to be superwoman.

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